It all Falls Apart
by suicidalrainbow
Summary: Song Fic to Placebo's Passive Aggressive. Angst-ish romance fic. Dreams are attained then shattered...just read. ||note: first gundam wing ficcy|| Oh, and possible implied yaoi....


placebostory _A/n: First Gundam Wing Fic. Song fic to Placebo's_ Passive Aggressive. _Both GW and the song belong to there respective owners. Told in any perspective, but When i wrote it I had Dou in mind....so possible implied slash._   
  


_it's in your reach_   
_concentrate_   
_it's in your reach_   
_concentrate_

I told you I loved you. You said you wanted me. I was there before you, my heart open and waiting. I was there. I know you heard me. I know you saw me. I know you knew I was there For YOU. What went wrong? Why did you not take me? If you wanted me, how come I'm here alone? 

_if you deny this_   
_then its your fault_   
_that god's in crisis_   
_he's over_

If you reject me, you will know what you've done to me. You will know how this hurt me. You will know you caused it. And you'll have No One to blame but yourself. It's your fault if you deny me. 

_it's in your reach_   
_concentrate_   
_it's in your reach_   
_concentrate_

I put myself in front of you. I opened part of me, that for years I kept hidden. I let you in. And you said you wanted me. YOU SAID IT! For once you were in my reach. I could have you. And you could have me. You said you wanted me, you did. So why, gods dammit, are you not here by my side? Why? 

_if you deny this_   
_then its your fault_   
_that god's in crisis_   
_he's over_

It seems surreal. Those few minutes on the bridge. Something happened...but now I'm not sure. I want you. I've wanted you all the time I've know you. I told you, I know I did. I couldn't have imagined all of this....No. I did say it, and you did the last thing I expected. You said you felt the same. But it didn't end the way all my dreams did. In the end of all my imaginings- you never, **never**, walked away. 

_every time i rise_   
_i see you falling_   
_can you find me space_   
_inside your bleeding heart_

After the war ended, you seemed so different. You still were quite, and closed up, but you had no purpose. At least that what it seemed like. You would stumble from thing to thing. And every time something went wrong I watched you fall. I don't think you were ever made to fail. You just couldn't accept it. You were supposed to be the perfect soldier. But what was suppose to happen when any soldier, let alone the perfect soldier, was not needed any longer? Why couldn't anyone have foreseen that you knew nothing else? 

_every time i rise_   
_i see you falling_   
_can you find me space_   
_find me space_

I tried to help you. I could function, and you could not. I tried to keep you from sinking, I did! All that could have been asked is that you know that I cared. But you were falling apart, and in on yourself. It seemed you couldn't see what was in front of you. I was there. I loved you, and it hurt knowing that you didn't know that. Gods did it hurt. All I wanted was to have you love me. Just to have that little piece of your heart. I know you have one, unlike others who think your cold. But maybe it was just pain, and lack of care in your life that made you, well, you. 

_it's in your reach_   
_concentrate_   
_it's in your reach_   
_concentrate_

We stood together for minutes on end. Just stood there on the bridge. No words spoken, but I _felt _so much. I knew you hurt, even if you wouldn't tell me. And I still loved you, no matter if you didn't love me or if you were in so much agony you couldn't do a thing. So I told you. And, oh gods, you should have seen you eyes. For the first time, in I don't know how long, they seemed to possess life. And you spoke, or rather stammered, that you wanted me. And My heart stopped. Truly it halted beating for those moments. I was so happy for that single second. 

_if you deny this_   
_then its your fault_   
_that god's in crisis_   
_he's over_

But you took it all away. The happiness was shattered when you told me that you wanted me, but couldn't have me. You said that I deserved better. Tell me, how could I do any better than having the one thing I want? Isn't the hardest thing in life to attain your dreams? Well for that moment right before you denied me I had my dream. I achieved what others died trying for. You just kissed me, turned, and walked away. And I hate myself for not stopping you. I hate me for being so wrapped in my emotions that I let you drift out of the peir's light. And I hate myself for being mad. 

_every time i rise_   
_i see you falling_   
_can you find me space_   
_inside your bleeding heart_

All I wanted was you. Just that. The war after affects, the colonies, the other people- I could forget them. But I want you. You have no idea how it hurts to know you walked away from me. I laid my soul in front of you, and You wanted it, But you denied it. And the pain is overwhelming. And really, I can't do anything without you. As corny as it sounds....You gave me a meaning. YOU made me function. And all I wanted was that little space left in your bleeding and broken heart. That's all. Just a space in your heart. 

_every time i rise_   
_i see you falling_   
_can you find me space_   
_inside your bleeding heart_   
_it falls apart_   
_it falls apart_   
_it falls apart_

But I guess everything _does_ fall apart in the end. Because as simple as this may have seemed, that all I had to do was run after you, it wasn't that simple. And frankly I don't think I could have handled being denied again. Because what Can one do, when their whole world shatters...again?   


_every time i rise_   
_i see you falling_   
_can you find me space_   
_inside your bleeding heart_

All I did was tell you I wanted you. I just for once I wanted to feel whole...complete. I wanted you to be my piece. And you wouldn't let me have what was mine. You wouldn't let me love you. In essence you told me to give up ever thing I wanted, everything that could hold happiness. All I wanted was you. You couldn't see that, could you? And all I still want is you. But now your lost forever...because you won't let either of us love. 

So my last wish is only now that you know you hurt me. That this is your fault. That no one is to blame but you. But I still love you...how could I not? So I wish you could see that. I wish it wasn't falling down. I wish you could see. I wish I'd stopped you. 

_every time i rise_   
_i see you falling_   
_can you find me space_   
_inside your bleeding heart_   
_it falls apart_   
_it falls apart_   
_it falls apart_

And I wish you knew still I love you, Heero. 


End file.
